Gartan’s Book – 11/4/10

2004 words.  2 full scenes and 1 partial scene.

Partial Scene:  The Governor, who’s getting up from his nap, reads a note left by a servant telling him that the antag isn’t the nice person he seems to be.  The governor decides to get to the bottom of this.

Scene 1:  The thief sneaks into the dark mansion and follows the voices and smells to the billiard room.  He hears the protag make a deal with the antag and the Thief bursts into the room to put a stop to it and to try to save her.  But, he doesn’t have much in the way of a plan.  He’s just fighting.  He pulls the protag’s son off of her and breaks the kid’s neck and then back to the fray with the antag.

Scene 2:  The protag is tired and spent.  She’s just seen her son die again and she knows he’s going to come back.  But she can’t kill him.  She can’t.  The book “speaks” to her and she crawls over to it (she’s in bad shape at this point.)  The book opens to a spell but she doesn’t think she’s got enough strength to throw it.  Her son starts to rise.  She forces herself to try to cast the spell.  Her son jumps on her back and starts sucking her blood as she’s casting it.  The thief and the antag are busting up the room fighting.  And she’s having problems with the words and gestures required for the spell.  But she finishes it and feels it drain everything out of her.  Light and power explode from her as the spell sucks the last bits of energy from her soul.  And she feels it going wrong.   The spell misfires and crashes back on her.   And she dies.

The end…

PSYCH!  Not really.  Still got a few scenes to tie everything up and put a bow on it.  I’ve also got a few scenes to go back and get.  And I’ve got to decide whether I want to do the Fable part of the book that tells the story of the demon who is the source of vampirism as a series of stories like Aesop’s Fables.


3 Responses to “Gartan’s Book – 11/4/10”

  1. You are kidding? Surely the protag wins out after all she has been through?
    Even if it is a series, don’t leave it there, or readers won’t want to read the next book. Other than those comments, well done for completing the revision. 🙂

  2. thepencilneck Says:


    Yes. I’m kidding. Kinda. It’s not done, yet. I’ve got a few more twists up my sleeves.

  3. That’s good. 🙂

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